Fucked-up Jokes

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What's the difference between a gay guy and a microwave?

The microwave doesn't brown your meat.

A priest is driving along a highway when he comes across a crying boy on the side of the road. He stops and asks the boy what he is doing out there all alone. The boy replies, "My whole family just went over the cliff in the car!" The priest hops out of his car, goes over to the boy, flops out his cock and says, "My boy, this just isn't your day."

What has two heads and six legs?

Nirvana.

A kid goes up to his father and says, "Hey, Pop, know how old I am today?"

His father says, "No...how old?"

He says, "I'm eleven!"

He goes into the kitchen and says to his grandfather, "Hey, Grandad, know how old I am today?"

He says, "Come closer..."

He unzips his jeans and reaches his thin, spotted arm down into his underwear.

He fondles his grandson's genitals for a few minutes and then he says, "You're eleven."

He says, "How could you tell?"

He says, "I heard you tell your father."

Q: How does an ethiopian woman know when she's pregnant? A: When she pulls out her tampon and it's half eaten.

what do you call an ethiopian taking a shit?

a showoff

I sat on the end of the bed last night pulling off my boxers.

The wife looked at me and said "Please don't do that to the dogs".

Don't google "what made mary murky". Seriously.

No, google "what made Mary mucky" instead. I warned you.

WHY

WAS

MARY

MUCKY?

Jeffrey Dahmer's mom was concerned about the type of people her son 'hung out' with. One day Dahmer invited his parents to dinner. While eating, Dahmer's mom stated, "Jeffrey, I don't think I like your friends." So Dahmer said, "Well then just eat the noodles."

man #1: I think my wife is cheating on me with the pool cleaning guy.

man #2: What makes you think that?

man #1: We don't have a pool.

^ hahahahaha

{-} what's this?

An Ethiopian with a grain of rice stuck in his throat.

A man was looking in the classifieds for a new dog, and he saw an ad that read "TALKING DOG - $20". Curious, he went and checked it out.

The owner answered the door, and showed him to the dog. The potential buyer said, "So you can talk! Tell me a little about yourself."

The dog says, "Well, I spent two years conducting search and rescue missions, I searched for survivors in the rubble of the Twin Towers, and gave a speech to the graduating class of the local university."

The potential buyer says to the owner, "This dog is amazing! Why in the world would you get rid of such an amazing animal?"

The owner says, "Because he's a fucking liar!"

This is probably the most useful thread on this piece of shit board.

Two priests and a rabbi walk into a bar... The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this, a joke?"

^brilliant

two girls one cup :)

This thread leaves me bereft of ennui.

^ get yer own schtick, numbnuts

One day Timmy was at his Grandpa's farm and he asked him about sex.

He sort of smiled and said, "Timmy instead of telling you what sex is, why don't we go out to the horse pasture and I'll show you."

So Grandpa took Timmy to the horse pasture and there on the ground Timmy's parents were having sex.

Knock Knock. -Hello? -Can Timmy come out for a game of baseball? -But you know Timmy has no arms or legs! -Yeah we know, but we need him for second base.

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow?

Her dog was blind, too.

How come Helen Keller wore tight jeans?

Her friends were lip readers.

Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself?

You would too, if your name was "aaauuugiwooiguu"

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? Niether did she.

Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand? So she can moan with the other.

^^ Is that supposed to be all one joke?

^ It's five Helen Keller jokes. I intended for them to be more organized. I did the spacing (the paragraphing) wrong, I guess. I should have numbered them, too.

ok i got a few :D 1. What's the worst part about having sex with a 4 year old?

Getting the blood off your clown costume...

Figment stole my sig!

2. What's grosser then 10 dead babies in 1 garbage can?

1 dead baby in 10 garbage cans

3. Why does a bride smile as she walks down the aisle? - she knows she's given her last blow job.

i got more :D_

4.) What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? - nothing she's been told twice already

5.) (this one's my best)Want to see a joke? go look at your dic

6.) Cake or Death? Uh, I'll have the cake please.

7.) What did the Jewish pedophile say to the little boy once he was in the car?

Hey, go easy on the candy!

8.) Q: What did the seven dwarfs say when the prince awakened Snow White?

A: "I guess it's back to jerking off."

9.) How do you get a pedophile out of your house?

Abort the fetus

10.) What's green, covered in crumbs, and lies on the side of the road?

A dead Girl Scout

......................................................... i will have Black jokes next.... and i don't mean to hurt anyone ;D

well where are the black jokes?

Well, we've got one in office...nyuk nyuk nyuk

What's the definition of confusion?

Fathers day in a black neighborhood.

This snail crawls up to this door and knocks on it. The guy opens the door to see this snail at his doorstep. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he could.

2 months later the snail knocked on his door again. the guy opens the door, and the snail said "what the fuck was that all about?"

1) Two guys walk into a bar... You'd think at least one of them would have seen it...

2) A dog walks into a Korean Bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here".

3) Man comes home from date, asks girl upstairs. She says "Don't you think it's a little presumptuous expecting sex on the first date?" Man says "Don't you think presumptuous is a big word for an 8 year old?

1- What are women thinking during anal sex?

Is it normal for the doctor to keep both hands on my shoulders during a prostate exam?

2- What are women thinking during anal sex?

"I wonder if he's pretending I'm my brother."

3- Woman get's married to a sailor and after a few months is chatting to her mother who has a little experience with such men and - knowing how innocent her daughter is - asks what he's tried sexually. "Has he ever tried to...you know..?" Asks mum. "Tried to what?" replies daughter. "You know... Has he ever tried to 'turn you over' and put it in 'there'?" Daughter replies back horrified at such a thought; "Oh God No! - I don't want to get pregnant!!!"

Ed came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.

He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, "You died in your sleep, Ed."

Ed was stunned. "I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!"

St. Peter said, "I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken."

Ed was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking and pecking the ground..

A rooster strolled past. "So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?"

"Not bad," replied Ed the hen, "but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!"

"You're ovulating," explained the rooster. "Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before?"

"Never," said Ed.

"Well, just relax and let it happen," says the rooster. "It's no big deal."

He did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg! He was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming..

As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard.....

"Ed, wake up! You shit the bed!"

A man comes home in the wee hours after a night of heavy drinking.

He stumbles up the stairs to the bathroom and grabs a bottle of aspirin from the med cabinet. He then heads to the bedroom where his wife is sleeping.

Standing over her, he dumps 4-5 pills in his hand and proceeds to try to put them in his wife mouth, when she wakes.

" What the hell are you doing?"

"Heeeey baby...I wuz just just trying to give you some aspirin for your headache..."

"I don't HAVE a headache, you drunk asshole!"

"Well in that case, lez FUCK!!!"

some of you where asking me to post the black jokes so i am going to... heads up i don't mene to hurt anyone feeling

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

What's the difference between a nigger and a snow tire? A snow tire doesn't sing when you put chains on it.

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? Niggers.

Why don't sharks eat niggers? They think it's whale shit.

What do you call a nigger in a tree with a briefcase? Branch manager.

How come there aren't any Mexicans on Star Trek? They don't work in the future, either.

Why do niggers cry during sex? The Mace.

How do you stop a nigger from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

How do you get a nigger out of a tree? Cut the rope.

What did the Alabama sherriff call the nigger who had been shot 15 times? Worst case of suicide he had ever seen.

What's the difference between dog shit and niggers? When dog shit gets old it turns White and quits stinking ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ask and i will put some fucked up yo mama jokes up

hey i got a few more black jokes ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Where is the best place to hide a nigger's food stamps? Under his work boots.

How can you tell when a black as been on your computer? It is not there.

How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

What's the good part of there being no blacks on the Jetsons? It means the future will be great!

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. "Oh, den I uses the last names."

There is a 3 story apartment building with 1 apartment on each floor. A white family lives on the top floor. A mexican family lives on the second floor. A nigger family lives on the botom floor. At 2:00 PM in the afternoon a terrrible tornado hits the building, totally destroying it. Which family lived? The White family, because both parents were at work and the kids were in school.

Why do blacks have white hands and feet? They were on all fours when God spray painted them!

Why don't sharks eat niggers? They think its whale shit!

What's the most confusing day in Harlem? Fathers Day!

What do you call a black woman who gets an abortion? A member of Crimestoppers of America.

What's long and black? The unemployment line

A nigger and a spic fall from a tree, who hits the ground first? The spic, the nigger never makes it because he's stopped by the rope.

Why are niggers getting hit by cars more in winter on snowy days? They are easier to spot

Whats long and hard on a nigger? First grade.

What do black men do after sex? 15 years to life.

Why do decent white folks shop at nigger yard sales? To get all their stuff back.

What's the difference between a black and a white fairytale? White begins, "once upon a time," black begins, "y'all motherfuckers ain't gonna believe dis shit!"

Why do pill bottles have cotton buds in the top of them? To remind niggers that they were cotton pickers before they were drug dealers.

Leeroy is talking to his parents about his problems: "Mummy, whenever I try to play with the white boys and girls, they always call me a nigger - why is that? "Well," replies his mum, "that's because you are black." "And mummy, why do the teachers shout at me and tell me to go away, but they are nice to the white boys and girls?" "Well," replies his mum, "that's because you are black." Then Leroy grins and says "Well, whenever I'm in the shower with the white boys I notice that my penis is much bigger than their penises." "Well," replies his mum, "that's because you are 37."

How has Jesse Jackson lost the vote of most niggers? He promised to create jobs for them if elected.

What's black and white and goes rolling along the boardwalk? A nigger and a pigeon fighting over a chicken wing!

How does a girl from Harlem practice safe sex? She locks the car doors.

What are the 3 things you cannot give a black guy? A fat lip, a black eye, or a job.

What do nigger pimps and farmers have in common? They both need a hoe to stay in business!

What is the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman can go into a convenience store without Robin.

What did the Alabama sherriff call the nigger who had been shot 15 times? Worst case of suicide he had ever seen.

Black magic.... It doesn't work.

I'm not racist, my shadow is black.

I've got this black friend... just kidding.

Why is making toast like an interracial couple having a baby? It's annoying when it comes out black.

How do you know Adam and Eve were not black? You ever try to take a rib from a nigger?

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

Someone just knocked on the door selling raffle tickets for poor black orphans. I said "Fuck that, with my luck I'd probably win one"

What does FUBU stand for? Farmers Used to Beat Us -OR- Farmers Used to Buy Us

Hear about G.M.'s new nigger Cadillac? The glove compartment's big enough to hold a watermelon.

Did you hear that the KKK bought the movie rights to Roots? They're going to play it backwards so it has a happy ending.

What happens to black people after they die? Nigger Mortis.

What repulsive thing can be found in a nigger's clothes? The nigger.

A Liverpool docker went to South Africa for a job. The boss tells him: "Its people like you we want here. Here's a test. There's a revolver, go out and shoot 6 niggers and a rabbit." The docker asks: "Why do I have to shoot the rabbit?" He got the job.

Racism is when you run over a nigger with your truck. Reverse-racism is when you back up.

Why don't niggers celebrate Thanksgiving? Kentucky Fried Chicken isn't open on holidays.

If Tarzan and Jane were black, what would Cheetah be? The brains of the outfit.

Why are so many niggers moving to Detroit? They heard there were no jobs there.

What does cotton have in common with noses? Niggers are good at picking both.

Why do niggers always have sex on their minds? Because of the pubic hair on their heads.

What happened when the nigger looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face What do you call a nigger in a suit? Defendant

A teacher was giving a lesson and was telling the pupils that we came from Adam and Eve. A hand went up and the kid said, "But my dad told me that we come from apes, Miss?" Miss replied, "Stay out of this one, Leroy!"

Morpheus and Neo are plugged in to the Matrix and having a chat. Morpheus turns to Neo, "In this world you can be anything you want." There is a short silence. Neo: "Then why are you a nigger?"

What did God say when he made the first nigger? Oops! I burnt this one!

How are black people and tornadoes similar? It only takes one to ruin a neighborhood.

What did Whitney Houston and Apollo 13 have in common? A major crack problem

Why do a lot of niggers go to visit the Liberty Bell? They heard was was some crack in it.

A large cruise ship strikes an iceberg and slowly begins to sink. The captain declares he is going to need to remove some weight from the boat or it will surely sink. He says to be fair, and not discriminate, we will have to call out people in alphabetical order to jump off the ship. Everyone agrees this is the only fair way. The captain then declares "All African Americans, jump overboard!" A niglet tells his dad"Oh noes, dat be us". His nigger dad says "No sons, dats not be quiet" The captain comes back and says "unfortunately, we haven't lost enough weight yet. I will have to ask all black people to jump overboard." The niglet tells his dad again"Oh noes, dat be us". His nigger dad says "No sons, dats not be quiet" The captain comes back and says "unfortunately, we still haven't lost enough weight yet. I will have to ask all colored people to jump overboard." The niglet tells his dad again"Oh noes, dat be us". His nigger dad says "I said shut up son, we be niggers today!"

What's the best way to keep a nigger confused? Ask him what's his daddy's last name!

Whitney Houston’s life is like skiing. Once you get on the white powder, it’s all down hill from there

Why Do Blacks Hate Country? Every time they here Ho-Down They think someone shot their sister

What do you call the New Orleans Superdome full of milk? Cocoa Puffs.

What was the only thing missing from the million man march? An auctionner

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and your TVs floating in the air? Drop it nigger!

What do you call an all-black beach? A litter box.

Whats the difference between a nigger and a large pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

Whats faster then a nigger running with your TV? His brother with the VCR.

What do you call 4 black guys in a car? Tinted windows.

It's true what they say about once you try black, you never go back. I dated a black girl and now my family has disowned me.

Why do niggers have red eyes after sex? Pepper spray.

What's the difference between a nigger and a bouncy castle? You dont take your shoes off to jump on a nigger!

What do you call a nigger with a regular job, who doesn’t drive a lowrider, sleeps in the same bed every night, doesn’t collect welfare, and doesn’t rape White women? An inmate.

The black guy I was walking behind stopped, turned and asked "Are you following me?" "No", I said "You've got evolution all mixed up."

A 5 year old black boy walks up to a 5 year old white boy and says, "My daddy's goy a car. When he honks the horn it goes 'honkey honkey'". Little white boy says, "shit, my daddys got a chain saw when he starts it up it goes 'run nigga nigga run'".

A nigger walks into a bar with a pig. The bar man shouts "Oy, you can't bring that in here!" To which the pig replies, "sorry man, it won't happen again."

What do a nigger and a bicycle have in common? They only work with a chain on.

Why are niggers' teeth so white? So you know where to aim your punch when you're about to get mugged at night.

What do you get when you cross a nigger and a gorilla? A really stupid gorilla.

Have you heard scientists have bred a nigger with an octopus? It's an ugly fucker, but it sure can pick cotton.

How do you make a nigger nervous? Take it to an auction.

What's the diffrence between a park bench and a Nigger? The Bench is the only thing that can support a family.

What does a nigger have in common with a soda machine? They both don't work and always take your money.

Why don't niggers like asprin? They're white, they work and you have to pick cotten to find them.

What do you call one black guy on moon? A problem. What do you call two black guys on the moon? A problem What do you call the entire race of black? guys on the moon? A problem solved.

How do you stop a nigger from drowning? You don't.

Why was the wheelbarrow invented? To teach niggers to walk on their hind legs.

What did the sunbather shout at the nigger? Ain't you dark enough already?

What's a crying shame? When a bus full of niggers drives off a cliff and there were 3 empty seats.

Why are there trees in Harlem? Public transportation.

Did you hear about Ku Klux Knieval? He tried to jump 50 niggers with a steam roller.

What is the difference between a white owl and a black owl? A white owl goes, "Who, who," a black owl goes, "Who dat? Who dat?"

Sheniqua was excited about her upcoming birthday. She told her mother that uncle Leroy was going to take her to Florida for her birthday. Her mother asked Leroy if this was true. Leroy said "No. I told her when she turned seventeen I was goin to tampa with her."

A nigger and a little white boy are debating on whether God is black or White. finally the little white boy says, "let's ask God!" The White boy looks to Heaven and asks, "God, are you black or white?" God replies, "Well boys, I am what I am." The White boys exclaims, "well, that proves it, God is White!" The nigger asks, "how do you know?" The White boy replies, "if God was a nigger he woulda said 'I iz what I iz!'"

A nigger goes into a library and says, "I..." The librarian interrupts and says, "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."

What do you call a barn full of dead niggers? Out dated farm equipment.

How did a whole regiment of niggers die in WWII? When their commander said "get down" they started dancing!

Why do monkeys always look so sad? They know they'll be black one day.

3 kids in school one day. The teacher asks them, "What do cows say?" Amy replies "moo!" Teacher then asks, "What do sheep say?" Jack replies, "baa!" Teacher then asks, "What do pigs say?" Leroy says "Freeze motherfuckin' nigger, what's in the fuckin' bag?"

Why do all black people run fast? Because all the slow ones are in jail.

Why are there only 2 pall bearers at a nigger’s funeral? A garbage can only has two handles!

"Life is like a box of chocolates." Not all the black ones can be trusted.

How is a nigger like a broken gun? It doesn’t work and you can’t fire it.

What do you call 10 niggers in a steam room? Gorillas In The Mist.

A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men". So he stabs her and takes her purse.

How can you tell a black person is lying? His lips are moving.

What does NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People

Why do black people have white hands? Everyone has some good in them.

Why don't niggers go on cruises? They're not falling for that one again.

"Still hung. Over." replied the KKK member being asked about the condition of the nigger over his 2 way radio.

How dose every black joke start? With someone looking around to see if their are any black people there

A Mexican and a nigger are riding in car. Who's driving? A cop.

A white man walks into a bar and notices a black bartender. "I'll have a beer, nigger" says the white man. "Hey there is no need for you talk to me like that. How would you like it if I talked like that to you?" says the black bartender. "Why don't we swap places and find out?" says the white man. The white man and black bartender swap places. The black bartender walks up to the white man who is now behind the bar and says "Hey you honkey, give me a fucking beer!". The white man replies back with "Sorry we don't server niggers here!"

I've always got on with my neighbors. That was until we had a black family move in next door. Suddenly everything changed. Doors were constantly being slammed, there was shouting and music was played at full blast into the small hours. Despite trying all that, I still couldn't get that damn black family to move out.

I was on the bus the other day when a massive nigger came and sat next to me. I slowly started edging away from him and he said; "What, you think I'm gonna steal from you, cos I'm black?" "No, I think you're going to steal from me because you have a fucking gun!"

Did you hear about the guy that broke into the local library and stole hundreds of books? Nobody knows who he is yet, but police say, "it certainly wasn't a nigger."

it took nine fucking day's to type these out

use ctrl+c then ctrl+v

your so funny not...anyway to move this on...i got some Jewish jokes and no i don't mene to hurt anyone (feeling that is

Why did Hitler kill himself? The Jews sent him a gas bill!

Have you heard of the Jewish "Catch 22"? Free Ham!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when they are put in the oven!

What's the difference between a catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewellery!

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? A canoe tips!

What's the difference between Santa Claus and a Jew? Santa Claus goes down the chimney.

I asked a jewish girl for her number. She rolled up her sleeve.

Why do Jews have such big noses? Because air is free!

What's the difference between karate and judo? Karate is a method of self defence and judo is what bagels are made of!

What do Jewish women make for dinner? Reservations!

One day a Jewish grandmother had taken her grandson to the beach for a play when suddenly a huge wave washed over the infant and pulled him out to sea. The distraught grandmother fell down on her knees, and sobbed, "Please God, don't let my grandson die, please, he is my only grandson! He is the future of my family, please return him to me safely!" Instantly another huge wave rolls the infant back onto the beach and the grandmother looks up to the sky and said, "He had a hat!"

How do you know when your on a Jewish golf course? The players don't yell 'FORE' they yell '$3.99!'

How do you get 100 jews into a car? Throw a quarter in it. How do you get them out again? Tell them Hilter is driving.

What language does a Jewish homo speak? Heblew What's faster than a speeding bullet? A jew with a coupon.

'There is safety in numbers' Unless there are 6,000,000 of you. And you are all Jews.

Why are Jewish synagogues round? So they cant hide in the corner when the collection box comes round!

Did you hear about the Jewish Santa Claus? He came down the chimney and said "Do you want to buy some presents kiddies?"

What's the difference between boy scouts and Jews? Boy scouts come back from their camps.

I just went to a Jewish furniture store as they were offering 0% finance for upto 10 years! "That's great!" I said as I signed the contract. "When will it be delivered?" "When you've paid the balance" he smiled.

I used to work for a Jewish carpenter. He used to check my fingers for splinters to make sure I wasn't stealing.

There wouldn't be any Jews in America if they hadn't heard about the right of free speech.

I went to a fancy dress party the other day dressed as Adolf Hitler. Everyone thought it was hilarious. Until they found three dead Jews in the shower.

Why don't Jews eat pork? Jews may be a lot of things but cannibals they are not!

Two Jews were sitting on a pier passing the time of day. The first Jew puts his feet in the water and cries, "It's cold, it's cold!" The second Jew puts his nose in and screams, "It's fucking deep too!"

Hitler may have killed 6 million Jews, but he sure as fucking hell saved the History channel.

Why do pregnant Jews always go for Cesarian section? Because they`re tight cunts.

Two Jewish businessmen were discussing insurance. "You need fire insurance, burglary insurance and flood insurance." "The fire and theft and burglary I can understand," said the other, "but the flood insurance? How do you start a flood?"

I can't believe the judge said I was a particularly ruthless kidnapper and a disgrace to the Jewish community. All because I added shipping and handling charges to the ransom note.

More funny racist jokes coming!

fucc i just did not do that...i post with out puting my name in there oh well just to make that clere that last post was mine, and my speeling is fucced up so so sorry for this...anyway i got a few more

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, and swim has already crossed the border!

Whats a Mexicans favourite sport? Cross Country.

What's the difference between Jesus and Mexicans? Jesus doesn't have Mexicans tattooed all over him.

What do you call a little Mexican? A paragraph. Because he's not quite an essay.

What do you call a Mexican who can swim? A Texan.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball against each other? Juan on Juan.

There was a 4 car crash in Mexico today. 243 people died.

What do you call a Mexican with a broken lawn mower? Unemployed.

How does a Mexican get into an honest business? Through the window.

How many Americans' does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only Mexicans do that kind of job.

What do books have that Mexicans don't? Papers.

How do you keep a troll from spending 9hrs. writing racist jokes?

You hide his meth.

What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common? Their Black, Plastic, and little boys turn them on!

just a joke, don't flame me with the whole "Michael Jackson is dead, have some respect!" thing.

what do you call a Mexican that cant get a job?

A Dizzle

C'mon, seriously dude, get it together

^there like 100 more jokes up there so don't hate^

puls theas are fucked up joke so the point is jokes you don't here that much

^thread i keep fucking up my spelling

i am geting this to back to the top

A Spanish Armada is coming to invade your tenement.

hahahahahahahahahaha

that so funny :D

http://airstre.am/dopamine72/Nicolas%20Cage%20Laugh.gif

Holy smokes!

that funny

How do you know when an Ethiopian woman is on her rags?

Flies are wearing lipstick

A wife texts her husband on a cold winter's morning: "Windows frozen."

Husband texts back: "Pour some lukewarm water over it."

Wife texts back five minutes later: "Computer completely screwed up now."

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